Part two – Finding the Tools to Prevent the Freak Out!

I’ll tell you the business application in tomorrow’s post, but I want you to hear the story of how this all came to be, because it’s pretty funny. Pathetic perhaps, but funny.

A friend and I decided to take our kids to the water park.  To tell you the truth, I was really cranky because it was about a hundred million degrees and I’d rather be anywhere but outside. But I said yes because the boys were super excited to go.

When we got there, we first went to more of the ‘kid-friendly’ area where there were a few teenagers, but mostly people under four feet tall. It was here that I finally decided to just go for it, so I think I did one 20 feet high open slide.  That open piece is the key because being in an enclosed tube in the black was more than my little psyche could handle. Me and the toddlers were content to stay on the baby-ish slides, but my boys wanted to head over to where the real action was.

Now that my kids were on the big slides, my only choice was to stand at the bottom, realizing what I was missing, mad at myself for having these stupid fears, and feeling pretty ridiculous that at age 50, I have this huge limiting thing. That’s where I began to make the decision that I was not leaving until I conquered my fear and did one of the slides, because I just knew that if I could do it, it would lead to a breakthrough somehow.

I found my boys and told them that I needed their help in getting over this fear. Having done most of the slides by now, they decided that I’d do the tubes that were only half way enclosed, but not pitch black. Let the journey begin!  Once decided on the slide, we began to scale what felt like five stories, and the closer I got, the more anxious I became. So anxious in fact, that I was almost hyperventilating! (But thankfully having done the Inner Guru Experience with Molly Luffy, I learned how to use EFT for just those situations!) It actually worked, and I was able to calm myself down enough to get up the stairs.

My ten year old was the one really leading the charge to get me to do this, and his famous coaching command to me (as I was doing EFT tapping like a fool and praying) was to say, “Come on mom, sack up!” Guess that’s boy love or something. Between that, the prayers, the tapping, and mostly my decision that I would not turn back, I did it!

One slide down! I did it and it was absolutely exhilarating. I had been able to conquer all my thoughts and calm myself down.

Now the boys decided to throw me into the black tube of death. (OK, it wasn’t really called that, but felt like it at the time!)

This slide was completely enclosed and totally black except for the last third. There was about a ten foot open space, and then it was enclosed again.

Being in this tube was where it all came clear to me. As I popped onto the inner tube and pushed myself into the water, it was pitch black. And the water was in control. Not me. Then and there I had the ‘a ha’ that this is the very place that business owners fear. Very often we hit places in our businesses where it almost exactly mirrors my experience here.

Tomorrow’s article will share with you the connection with the water slide, business breakthrough’s, and how to set yourself up to have one in any environment.

or “How my 10 year old coached me into getting over my fears and getting with the game of living bigger”

This is a story that I just kept writing and writing and writing, so we’ll break it up into three parts….

What if you could have a breakthrough in the most unlikely of places? What if doing one wild and crazy thing changed the way you experienced your business?

Because we are in some wacky times and almost every business owner I know has been faced with having to figure out how to get and keep clients, and how to best put forward their marketing messages. Since I’m in the middle of yet another rebranding, I’ve been experiencing some of that frustration myself. But it was all about to change….

There I was, finally facing my fears, barreling down one of those enclosed tube-style water slides, when it happened. CLARITY! It’s as if something Divine got revealed to me as I realized what a metaphor this was for not only my business, but for most business owners. Who would have thought that leaning into my HUGE fear of water slides would reveal something so symbolic and profound to me.

In that moment of surrendering to the water and where it was taking me through the black tube – I saw why so many business owners are struggling. Speeding down the tube, I even was able to see a solution! (Sort of like your life flashing before you…except I wasn’t going to the pearly gates, but to the big splash pool at the end.

Tune in tomorrow to hear how I went from a freaked out water-slide phobic mom, to a solid and grounded business owner who ‘got it’ in terms of the flow of life and business.

OK – Contest time!  And doesn’t everyone love a contest?

So here it is —

In July I will be rolling out my Happy in Business Mastermind groups.  What are these you ask?  Small, six person groups that will meet for six months and get lots of coaching/mastermind support.  How’s this different from all the other mastermind groups out there?  Well, let’s start with the number – SIX!  You won’t be stuck in a group with 24 other people and only get to share one time in a year.  Every meeting, you’ll get coaching.  Hey….if you want more details, check out the website, because here I just want to talk about the contest.

I’m going to give away one spot in the group for free.  That’s right.  FREE!  That means you will get access to all the coaching, all the business building/revenue generating magic that happens.

There’s just one catch though……..you have to send me a video explaining these two things:

Why your business should be selected and how you will pay this gift forward.

Paying it forward?  Yeah…what that means is that in six months when you have made much more money, are happier than you have been in your business, and are on track for even more success…what will you do to share some of that good with someone else?

And finally, make your video be something with BOLD Self Expression.  Sing, dance, get creative – but just make it fun and show up fully because that’s the key to having a business you will love.

How?  Send it via email (you can use www.YouSendIt.com) to therese@acceleratingyoursuccess.com.

These need to be in by June 20, so get on it!!!

And be sure to go to the next page – Coming events – to find my latest free teleclass.

Five words -

That’s all it took to turn her around.  One sentence.  Five well chosen words.  Here’s the story.

I was doing a group coaching call the other night when one of the women asked a question.  Now truthfully, this woman is amazing at what she does, but tends to ’spin around’ in her head a lot, so gets herself overwhelmed.

She’s a consultant and she asked me about how she should handle a proposal.  Now normally, I’d jump in and coach her on the how…but not today.

See, my intuition told me to go in a different direction.  So instead of answering her, I simply said:

“You know what to do.”

She missed it at first, so tried to get me again to tell her how to handle the proposal, but I wouldn’t budge.

“You know what to do.”

What happened next was amazing.  She stopped, got back into remember who she was, and immediately had a solution.

The reason I share this, my dear readers, is that the breakthrough for her occurred when someone who knew and respected her, “called her out” to be more in the strong, brilliant and resourceful person she was.

My coaching challenge for you this time is to make sure you have the people in your life who can give you this kind of feedback.  The folks who don’t let you spin around in confusion or overwhelm, but stop and remind you of your magnificence.

It’s all good!

And by the way, in June I’ll be opening up my Happy In Business Mastermind Coaching groups.  Stay tuned….

Oh, I feel like one proud mama!  Why, because my friend and client Mary Pat Kavanagh just today is launching her Savvy Mompreneur Telesummit.  Designed for the busy moms who have to balance family life, and a bit of self care, all while striving to be great business women at the same time.  Click on the link after you read this because she has an extraordinary line up of mompreneurs (including me!) who will be sharing our secrets of success.

So why am I sitting here with my heart full as I watch Mary Pat ‘birth’ this dream of hers?  Why?  Because I got to ‘midwife’ it into existence you could say.

I remember the day so clearly, about four months ago when we were working on a strategy for which direction she’d take her business in.  As her coach, I saw her getting stuck.  See, she started out as a marketing strategist, is now known as the Queen of Social Media/Networking, and is very good at both of these things.  But her heart is all about connecting with Savvy Mompreneurs to give them the tools they need to really have success in both their businesses and in their homes.

The problem though is that like many of us, Mary Pat wasn’t owning it.  She had the same litany of thoughts many people get into when their soul’s direction takes them on a new path.  It sounded something like this:
“But everyone knows me for Social Media, what will they think if I go into another new direction?”
And this:  “Do you think there really is a need for this?  Can I really be a voice in this community and help lots of women?”

Being the good coach I am, I gave her a gentle ‘butt kicking’ to help her take ownership of this passion.  It’s so funny that we very often know exactly where we want to be and what our next steps are, but allow our ’stuff’ to get in the way.  On that call, on that day, four months ago – Mary Pat finally said YES.

Fast forward a few months, and the ‘baby’ has been birthed.  Mary Pat started asking for some experts to share their stories.  She thought she’d get 5 or 6, but was blown away when 22 mompreneur experts stepped up and practically begged her to be a part of the telesummit.

In fact, Kristi Frank of season #1 of the Apprentice (who is also one of the special guest experts) wrote Mary Pat this note:

By the way – the talk I’m presenting for the telesummit is on February 19 at 10am Pacific.  It’s called:

Saying Goodbye to the Super Woman Complex: Ways to Take Care of Yourself, Your Family, and Your Business Without Losing Your Mind.  I’d love to ‘hear’ you on the call.

To your success!

Sitting in my home office looking out the window,  I notice that the trees are beginning to lose their leaves.  And next week on December 25th, much of the world celebrates a very significant birth.  So today’s thoughts are on what we have to let go of in order to allow new things to be born in us.

Most people I have worked with have a hard time accepting what I view as the very natural cycles of life.  Holding on – and Letting go.  Gaining and Losing. 

Mostly we want to keep a very tight grip on the things in our lives that have given us meaning, definition, and security.  These could be things like ‘our stuff,’ relationships, beliefs/ideas, and our sense of self.

And yet, the tree in my front yard holds onto nothing, knowing only that it’s now in the cycle of allowing the old leaves to drop and die………and that in the spring there will be new life.

So let me ask you….what are you holding onto right now, that somewhere deep down you know needs to be let go of?  What would you be afraid may happen if you just surrendered to the Divine Intelligence which is organizing your life and business?

As we come to the end of the year, I’d encourage you to make a list of the four areas that you may be holding on to.  Write anything that comes up for you, and then ask yourself this most powerful question:  “What does keeping this cost me?”

For example, you may have a belief you are holding onto that you really can’t charge more for your services, and I bet you could certainly figure out not only the financial, but also the self esteem cost for that one.  Ask that question for each item and you will create a powerful breakthrough for yourself.

Trust me…this exercise is way more powerful than creating New Year’s resolutions, and will serve you so much more!

And to support you in creating an amazing 2009, I’d love to share the gift of an interview I did recently for MaryPat Kavanagh’s “Savvy Mompreneur’s Connect.”  The talk was entitled:

The Power of Dreaming Big!  How to find, grow, and give birth to your dream

Even though the call was for the Savvy Mompreneur’s community, it’s very appropriate for everyone.

Click here to download the mp3.

Blessings,

Therese

“Don’t Have a Dog You Can’t Pick Up…Or A Business Too Big to Manage”
by Therese Skelly

After his recent near death experience and a VERY expensive surgery, I had to take my eleven year old dog Colby back to the vet to get his sutures out. He had eaten a stuffed Easter egg (which didn’t pass through!) so ended up having to have it removed which left an 8 inch incision in his stomach.

On Saturday morning as I was ready to get him in my van, I discovered that no matter what I did, he wasn’t going in. I’d lift, push, cajole, and basically tried everything I could do, but my 80 pound elderly, weak-in-the-hips pooch would just slide under the vehicle. It occurred to me that one of us was gonna get hurt, so I did what every smart business owner would do….I called in reinforcements! OK, the ‘muscle’ in this case was my ex who lives about a mile away. (Yeah, we have that cool kind of relationship….) One quick phone call and in a few minutes the ex popped over and said canine was comfortably in the seat on the way to the v et.

Support = success!

Now why in the world would I share this story about my geriatric dog and my need to call for help? Because it’s the perfect entrepreneur’s dilemma!

I had a ‘project’ I needed to do but didn’t have the resources to make it happen on my own. The theme for this article is to encourage you to see who can do the ‘heavy lifting’ and help you out in areas where you need some more support.

Below is my four-step process for embracing this really important principle in your business.

Step #1: Open your eyes! Take a look around at your business and where you either loose energy (bookkeeping maybe?) or where you are chronically overwhelmed, or when you know that if you just had a few key pieces in place….you’d really be able to take off. Sometimes it will be letting someone do the tasks for you, or maybe it’s the need you have to learn a new skill. For me it was social media. I knew that I wanted to jump on the latest relationship/networking building trend, but didn’t have a clue where to start. What would it be for you? Make a list…………

Step #2: Visualize! The next step is to allow yourself to imagine what would be possible if you had this piece in place. This is where the fun is. If you could design it EXACTLY how you wanted, how would it look/feel/be? My best learning style is having someone talk me through the process, because I am an auditory learner. So the perfect solution to my social media desire was to have someone go through step-by-step all the bells and whistles. I had even signed up for a couple of teleseminars with the ‘experts’ but didn’t use them as the PERFECT design in my mind was a one on one relationship with someone who would just tailor my learning. Your turn…dream big! What would you love to see in terms of support.

Step #3: Strategize! Now where do you find this person? There are two ways of doing it. The first is the ‘inner game’ way of just harnessing energy. Part of the ‘magic’ is if you just set the intention, the Universe conspires to support you. (Anyone ever watched The Secret?)

The next way is to do some research about who is out there that could ‘fill the bill’ for you in this area.

The magic for me came when I attended my coach Kendall Summerhawk’s Brand Authenticity Money and Meaning workshop in May. There I found my perfect solution! I had already known and was friends with Mary Pat Kavanaugh, but after spending three days with her, we really connected and decided that we could support each other. Guess what she specializes in? You got it….social media! She’s like the FaceBook Queen!

Now it’s your turn…after putting out the intention, create a list of where you could find the support you need and a list of who you could go to for help finding it. Don’t forget the power of your network. Ask others who they know.

Step #4: Realize! Now that you have found that perfect person, how is it going to work? What has to happen for you to put them on your team? Maybe you just need an advisory board or possibly a peer run mastermind. In either case, explore what’s the win-win for all parties involved. In my case, Mary Pat is mentoring me in FaceBook, and I help her by coaching her on her business growth and strategies that she can easily implement. < /o:p>

If you need to pay for some new team members, do a calculation about how much business you’ll need to bring in to cover the new cash outlay. Truthfully, many entrepreneurs get themselves stuck in the trap of “I can’t afford to pay anyone to help, but I’m so busy doing so much administrative stuff, that I can’t earn more money either.” If you find yourself in that conundrum, ask yourself the following questions -

1. What’s the minimum investment I’d need to make to move forward? (Example, if you can only spend $500/month…what could that money buy you?)

2. How long would it take for me (with the new people in place) to begin to see a return on my investment?

3. What is it costing me to NOT have these additional resources? This could be in time, money, or just stress! Be honest here.

I’d encourage you to follow the four-step process and email me to share who your ideal support people are and how you are going about getting them because you deserve it!

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE? Please do! Feel free to reprint this article on your website, own newsletter or message boards as long as you include the following resource information:

©2008 Therese Skelly. Discover a simple, yet surprising secret to getting unstuck in your small business by visiting www.AcceleratingYourSuccess.com and requesting a free copy of the audio, Master Your Mindset to Be the Master of Your Business.